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Murphy seadused

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Cool Andesta ja jäta meelde.
Cool Mis teiega eales ka ei juhtuks, kõigi teiste teie tuttavatega on varem nii juba juhtunud ja pealegi veel hullemini.
Cool See, kes naerab viimasena, ei saanud tõenäoliselt naljast aru.
Cool See, kes norskab, jäi esimesena magama.

Cool Eluliselt olulised paberid tõestavad oma elulisust, liikudes sealt, kuhu te nad jätsite, sinna, kust te neid ei leia.

Eestikeelsed Murphy seadused leiad näiteks siit kogumikust ja sellest kogumikust. humor.1.jpg

Tublid tegijad, kes on viitsinud need kokku koguda. Au ja kuulsus ja sügav kummardus! 

Wink Kõik head on juba ära võetud.

Wink Kui mõni ei ole ära võetud, on sel oma põhjus (järeldus esimesest).

Wink Mida kenam keegi on, seda kaugemal ta teist on.

Wink Ära iialgi vaidle naisega, kui ta on väsinud - või puhanud.

Armastuse ja seksi kohta saad Murphy seaduseid lisaks lugeda siit
Huvitavaid ja (taand)arendavaid artikleid.

Tongue out Murphy's laws

  • If anything can go wrong, it will
  • If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that will cause the most damage will be the FIRST to go wrong
  • If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway
  • If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which something can go wrong, and circumvent these, then a fifth way, unprepared for, will promptly develop
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse
  • If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
  • Nature always sides with the hidden flaw
  • Murphy's Law of Thermodynamics
    Things get worse under pressure.
  • The Murphy Philosophy
    Smile . . . tomorrow will be worse.
  • Quantization Revision of Murphy's Laws
    Everything goes wrong all at once.
  • Murphy's Constant
    Matter will be damaged in direct proportion to its value
  • Murphy's Law of Research
    Enough research will tend to support whatever theory.
  • Research supports a specific theory depending on the amount of funds dedicated to it.
  • Addition to Murphy's Laws
    In nature, nothing is ever right. Therefore, if everything is going right ... something is wrong.
  • More Laws
  • Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
  • It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
  • Rule of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you know the answer.
    Corollary: Provided, of course, that you know there is a problem.
  • Nothing is as easy as it looks.
  • Everything takes longer than you think.
  • Everything takes longer than it takes.
  • If anything simply cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
  • Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
  • Every solution breeds new problems.
  • The legibility of a copy is inversely proportional to its importance.
  • No matter how perfect things are made to appear, Murphy's law will take effect and screw it up.
  • You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
  • The chance of the buttered side of the bread falling face down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • More Laws of Selective Gravitation.
  • A falling object will always land where it can do the most damage.
  • A shatterproof object will always fall on the only surface hard enough to crack or break it.
  • A paint drip will always find the hole in the newspaper and land on the carpet underneath (and will not be discovered until it has dried).
  • A dropped power tool will always land on the concrete instead of the soft ground (if outdoors) or the carpet (if indoors) - unless it is running, in which case it will fall on something it can damage (like your foot).
  • If a dish is dropped while removing it from the cupboard, it will hit the sink, breaking the dish and chipping or denting the sink in the process.
  • A valuable dropped item will always fall into an inaccessible place (a diamond ring down the drain, for example) - or into the garbage disposal while it is running.
  • If you use a pole saw to saw a limb while standing on an aluminum ladder borrowed from your neighbor, the limb will fall in such a way as to bend the ladder before it knocks you to the ground.
  • If you pick up a chunk of broken concrete and try to pitch it into an adjacent lot, it will hit a tree limb and come down right on the driver's side of your car windshield.
  • More Laws of Selective Gravitation were sent by Jack from the Classic CKLW Page
  • The greater the value of the rug, the greater the probability that the cat will throw up on it.
  • You will always find something in the last place you look.
  • If your looking for more than one thing, you'll find the most important one last.
  • It is never in the last place you look. It is in the first place you look, but never discovered on the first attempt.
  • After you bought a replacement for something you've lost and searched for everywhere, you'll find the original.
  • You have to look where you lost it.
  • No matter how long or how hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it will be on sale somewhere cheaper.
  • The other line always moves faster.
  • In order to get a personal loan, you must first prove you don't need it.
  • Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost you more than you thought.
  • If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up.
  • If it jams - force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
  • When a broken appliance is demonstrated for the repairman, it will work perfectly.
  • Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.
  • Everyone has a scheme for gettin rich that will not work.
  • In any hierarchy, each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and then remains there.
  • There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over.
  • When in doubt, mumble. When in trouble, delegate.
  • Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening.
  • Murphy's golden rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.
  • A Smith & Wesson beats four aces.
  • In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
  • Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference.
  • Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
  • No good deed goes unpunished.
  • Where patience fails, force prevails.
  • If you want something bad enough, chances are you won't get it.
  • If you think you are doing the right thing, chances are it will back-fire in your face.
  • When waiting for traffic, chances are that when one lane clears the other is congested.
  • Just when you think things cannot get any worse, they will.
  • Remember the "Boomer-rang" effect; Whatever you do will always come back.
  • If you re-act to actions, you've acted on actions.
  • He who angers you controls you, there-fore you have no control over your anger.
  • Any time you put an item in a "safe place", it will never be seen again.
  • Your best golf shots always occur when playing alone.
  • The worst golf shots always occur when playing with someone you are trying to impress.
  • No matter how hard you try, you cannot push a string.
    (getting everyone in the family to the car at the same time for example)
  • The fish are always biting....yesterday!
  • You will never leave a parking space without someone in an adjacent space leaving at the same time.
  • The cost of the hair do is directly related to the strength of the wind.
  • Great ideas are never remembered and dumb statements are never forgotten.
  • The clothes washer/dryer will only eat one of each pair of socks.
  • When you see light at the end of the tunnel, the tunnel will cave in.
    ... The light at the end of the tunnel is a train
  • Cole's Law:
    Thinly sliced cabbage.
  • Being dead right, won't make you any less dead.
    Having the right of way, won't make you any less dead.
  • Whatever you want, you can't have, what you can have, you don't want.
  • Whatever you want to do, is Not possible, what ever is possible for you to do, you don't want to do it.
  • Traffic is inversely proportional to how late you are, or are going to be.
  • The complexity and frustration factor is inversely proportional to how much time you have left to finish, and how important it is.
Loe lisa: Murphy lehelt
Viimati uuendatud 18. detsember 2008


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